Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize