we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
