Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
