Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
foreskin is a definite game changer
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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