I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize