it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
