If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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