Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
