I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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