I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
