Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
