Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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