Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
