So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
