Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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