trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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