he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
it's not cheating when I paid for it
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Thank you for not boning my boss.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
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