East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize