He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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