okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize