I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
