Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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