so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize