put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
sarcasm needs its own font
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
