Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
