I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize