What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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