i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
