I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Randomize
