I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
how drunk are you?
Several
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
