We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
