You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
