My girlfriend figured out who you are.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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