Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
