Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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