He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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