So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
