Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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