You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
