Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
