Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
