how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
