Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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