you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
