Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
