i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
