TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
