I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
