i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
