Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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